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Sure, we’re in the small window of the calendar year when all four major professional sports are in progress, but that doesn’t mean we can’t take a quick break from the World Series, early season games in the NBA and NHL, and of course the middle stages of the NFL year to hear from one loquacious and buxom porn star Mary Carey. The one-time candidate for Governor of California was in Sacramento promoting an appearance at a strip club, so she spent some time onKHTKin studio with Carmichael Dave to kibbitz. And man, she talked and talked and talked. This was easily the hardest interview to transcribe, but it was also very, very entertaining. Take a listen yourself to her Carey talk about how she thinks Republicans can party just as hard as porn stars based on her experience at a National Republican Congressional.
Committee Dinner, why she thinks she’d do even better than she did a few years ago if she were to run for Governor of California again, how Melky Cabrera’s inability to understand a word she said derailed their relationship, and how Orlando Magic star Dwight Howard once pulled down his pants while in a bathroom with her – at the home of former N’SYNC singer Ryan Kirkpatrick’s house, no less. You can’t make this stuff up. (Editor’s note: Deadspin wrote a story about Carey and Howard back in 2007, but it mentioned they were hanging out. This is the first report that I’ve been able to find of Howard showing her his Magic wand.)
On her run for Governor of California during the recall a few years back:
“Well you know, I thought it would be fun. And it was actually – the owner at my porn company Kick Ass Pictures – they came up with the idea. They were like, do you want to run for Governor? And I was like, can I? I thought you had to go to an Ivy League school or something. And they were like no, it’s a recall, you only need 65 signatures and $3,000 dollars so if you want to do it…So I did it and I paid the money, and it just kind of like took off. I started getting on news shows, then I did this game show called Who Wants To Be Governor of California – and the winner got $21,000 and I won the game show. Yeah, it was fun. And it was funny, it was the first time I ever got to vote, because I never registered to vote before. I got to vote for myself, so it was cool!”
On if she’d accept the job had she won:
“I think I could do it, definitely. My English is better than Arnold’s. I think I’d get more people to watch and listen to my speeches.”
On the video floating around out there involving her and Melky Cabrera:
“Yes, the video that’s out there, you know it’s funny, a lot of people thought it was a sex-tape of us, but it’s not. It’s just us in a hotel room and I’ve got this cool little phone that I make videos on. And I made like three or four little videos where I interviewed him, and it’s funny because he speaks like no English. He’s really nice, but like the way I met him was his sports agent was like hey, this porn company was like do you want to go to a Yankees game, free tickets, go out to dinner with some players afterwards. I was like sure. So I met up with the agent, Wilson Betemit, Melky Cabrera, Robinson Cano I met, but didn’t come to dinner. But couple players, we all went out to dinner. And then Melky and I hit it off and we were hanging out and you know, it was really hard because the agent couldn’t communicate, he spoke Spanish, and I speak English. But when we were just the two of us, and we’d just sit there, I would text the agent and be like how ‘como se dice’ which is how do you say, so I was constantly like Melky, ‘como sedice’ I do a shot for Playboy. Or like, I went to his computer..he was funny because he showed me these little videos on YouTube of like, we went back and forth showing each other videos on YouTube of ourselves. He showed me these videos that his fans did of him making catches, and I showed him clips of me running for Governor. But I don’t think he understood a thing I ever said, even the video where I was asking him these questions like, ‘do you like living in America?’ And he was like ‘seven years.’ And I’d be like, okay, great. He never really understood what I was saying, ever. And you know, we tried talking, and like a week after I was talking to him, he got moved down to like the minor leagues. So then it was like a whole bunch of people saying it was my fault.”
And then on a far more comical note, her relationship with Orlando Magic star Dwight Howard:
“Yeah, Dwight and I met at LAX. I was like, you’re a basketball player, and he was like, I’ve seen you at Magic games, so he recognized me from games. I used to always get written up when I went to games for causing distractions and stuff.”
After a brief digression to talk about her nails, Carey continued on about Howard:
“Dwight’s a cool guy. For a month, we like talked on the phone, and he was always trying to give me prayers to get me out of porn and give me Bible verses to read. So then, I was going to go visit him when I was in Orlando, but I went over to this other guy’s house instead, Chris Kirkpatrick from N’Sync. And then Dwight started calling, and calling, and calling me, because he knew I was with Chris Kirkpatrick, so eventually at 3 in the morning, Chris was like don’t answer Dwight’s calls. I get a text from Dwight at 3 in the morning – I’m outside Chris’s house. I’m like oh my god, what do I do? I was like, I got Dwight here and I got Chris in the other room and I’m talking to them back and forth. So finally I had to just pull Dwight in the bathroom and tell him he needs to go home. I was like I’m really sorry, I really like you, but this isn’t the time or place. When I pull him in the bathroom, he pulls his pants down, I was like, whooa. Yeah, and so I ran and started screaming…Well if it wasn’t for the Chris thing at the time, I really liked Dwight and maybe I would have furthered this. But I was at the guy’s house I was dating so it was inappropriate. So he totally thought he totally offended me. So I saved – he and I used to talk on instant messenger, on AOL – so he was apologizing; sorry, that was out of character for me, blah blah blah. I saved all the instant messages and I’ve been putting them all in a book. So I’ve got a lot of evidence. I’ve got an evidence file.”
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